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This online dating thing really brings out some unexpected sides in people! It can’t just be me… (or can it?). I do not consider myself neither fickle, nor fake, as a person. But today, I got to see both those sides of myself….

Fickle: I changed my mind in a day, no, strike that, within a matter of hours. Earlier today, I was quite determined I wouldn’t put up photos on my dating site, for everyone to see. I even briefly discussed my reasons for this, with good blogging friend Mark, only to change my mind shortly after that discussion…

Uploaded a few photos of myself now, for everyone on the dating site to see… why? Cause I thought about how busy I already am with work, and writing the blog, and reading my blogging friends’ blogs. Etc. And I realized: I ain’t gonna have no friggin’ time to “take the initiative” and visit a lot of guys’ profiles on the dating site… They are gonna have to visit my page, and write me. Well, of course I will do some browsing of my own, too. But I absolutely will not be able to put enough time and effort into a “search” that becomes somewhat efficient…  so, photos are there. (Thanks to blogging friend Mark, for reminding me of what I already knew, that guys go for the photos…!).

Fake: I could say superficial, too… But, here’s the deal. I am not a superficial person. I’m really not… But, all human beings go for looks/physical attraction, in some way. And I noticed the only photos I had of myself were rather dull. They made me look, I don’t know… not myself, anyway. So, I opened my photo editor thingie, and just slightly adjusted for brightness etc in the photos. It made me look less like a scarecrow and more like a human being…

So I guess I am ok with being a little fake… Hey, I wouldn’t go out in a bathrobe on the street, with no make-up and flaunting my worst sides for the general public to run away screaming, now would I? Then why would I want to look my worst in a forum where I am actually trying to attract men..? I know, I know, I am only justifying my fake-ness to myself…

But there is something about this world within a dating site… it is really all like a huge department store, where you browse for people, like you would for a dress, or a suit…   It does bring out something strange in us humans, I think, to be put on display like this. If a dress in a department store could feel like we do, it would not want to hang on the hanger, with little holes in its fabric and specks of dust on it, for everyone to see… right?

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And I think we have been faking a long time, you know…  corsets, make-up, silicone, etc. So I think my move of editing a photo slightly, was a rather small fish in the pond, compared to the ocean of fakery out there. I didn’t even wear make-up in my photos… I’d say that’s rather bold and not-fake! 🙂 See, I am trying to restore my self image of being a profound person, and not this shallow girl… I think it’s working!

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Stray observations: Guy no. 1 on the site has sent me no less than three “flirts/pokes”, and 1 message on top of that. Another guy whose page I clicked on, seemed to have very strong and a bit scary, political views… Hmm. I am not impressed yet by this dating site scene. But it’s only been a day! I will give it time….   I’ll be glad if you follow my adventures which I’ll share on the blog! It will be nice to have you by my side…  You, who probably know me to be something else, besides the fickle and fake woman that emerged today! 💜